Sunapan

Sunepan ki kahani hain yeh
ek udaas dil ki daastan
jo dhundta phirta hain har kisi mein
phir woh masoom si ada

ghar dhunde, shehar ghume
par na mila
woh ek chehra
jo legaya needein meri
aur chod gaya mujhko tanha

kis se kahe
aur kahe bhi to kya
talaash thi jiski
uska tha na koi naam
sirf ehsaas, ..
bas ek ehsaas..

Srimad Bhagavatam

September 9th began the week for reading and finishing the Bhagavat Mahapuran.

Call it an epic, call it a novel, call it a Puran - look at it from a religious, spiritual or writing point of view but you cannot deny

its richness
the subtext
the layers of wisdom
the raw meanings of life
the science of existing
the reasons for basic emotions
the values of life
its secret teachings

Strange are the ways of this world.

While only one amongst millions have read it in its entirety, a few have heard about it, a vast majority of us never get the chance or the inclination to be exposed to the scripture or manuscript in its true form.

Maybe because right in the beginning it says - you need the merits of a countless lives to come closer to this epic..

Whether its merit or sheer chance, one things remains true. Once in contact with the Bhagavatam, you will never find yourself away from it..

Spontaneity in Writing

Always loved the idea of playing with words like a painter plays with colors. Like a musician flirts with his notes, experimenting and experimenting until it becomes a spontaneous image, a personal expression.

I guess sometimes we are not able to achieve that because we are stuck in this world of formulas. Of doing everything thats correct. Correct characterisation, correct plot, correct structure, everything and in doing that the beauty of the idea or thought disappears.

Yesterdays meeting a director who's known for his passion for cinema, in experimenting with forms, color, camera, images was an eye opener. Realised the enormous world of possibilities we can open if we only let go of ourselves while writing the lives of our characters.

And forget about whats right and wrong. Atleast experiment, some new strokes, some new colors, some new words, new moods, new forms - and see what emerges eventually.

This is something which I have longed to do, and am going to now do it..

Follow my instincts rather than the books of how to do it..

Eventually we got to live our own lives, and it cant be lived as per a rule book..

The call to adventure

is all writing real? Maybe..maybe not.

Well, I am really not sure. Just read a really popular blog which seemed more of a self obsessed confession with an extra bit of spice and masala just to add popularity to the site.

Is it all about getting more people to read? Getting more posts, more comments? Cant it be just a form of expression. Maybe not for him, her or anybody. Just for you, the writer.

Sometimes there is nothing to write, nothing to say. Most of us at times feel like there is nothing to be discussed. Its a dull odd day. Or maybe we aint doing enough to make things move, to get life into gear.

Sometimes everything is so hazy and confusing. Despite all efforts the fog just doesnt clear.
Sometimes how much ever you try, the smoke just doesnt clear.

Like this particular confused post, there is lot of cloud in my thoughts as well. Which need to be cleared for new thoughts to emerge, new forms to be explored.

Love the idea of beginning with zero, hitting on something which strikes a chord intuitively, and then letting the idea, the name, the character finds his or her own journey.

His own individual story.

Thats what I love about writing. Unknowingly you seed in a beginning, middle and end. You begin from abstract, find something which lights your eyes, and begin the journey.

Whether the hidden treasure is discovered or no doesnt matter. What matters is beginning the journey.

Thats what matters..Accepting the call to adventure...

Do films need to have dialogues for them to be understood?

This thought springs from the regional feature film I was watching the other day. Simple story, most writers and script editors would have called it bad script, but the fact remains that the film works. At all levels.

A day later a strange thing happened. There was something about the film which didnt leave me. I kept on going back to it, thinking about a moment here and there and realised even if I would have seen the film without subtitles I would have understood most of it, and still felt for the main character in the same way.

So somewhere down the power of storytelling crosses all boundaries of language and words. If feelings could be understood, there is no need for saying them.

A theory which brings back memories of silent films and masters like Charlie Chaplin.

The only way to learn scriptwriting is to minutely observe life and its situations and be sensitive towards people and in our approach to do good work.

Like Krishna says in the famous Bhagavat Gita from the epic Mahabharata, do your duty selflessly, and dont worry about the fruits of your actions. Because that my friend Arjuna, is not in your hands...

Is it always about a perfect script?

Saw a Kannada film Mungaru Malle last night, recommended by a close friend.

Sometimes begin to wonder the magic of storytelling doesnt lie in mastering the craft, nor understanding character, plot, conflict, three act structure, dialogues, subtext, or theme.

It is independent of the genre, the premise and the theme. It does not need a mentor or a guide or a doctor.

I have come to believe in recent times that stories which work on and off screen are the ones which manage to touch you. The ones which strike a chord in your heart. And this even a weak script, or a flawed character and plot structure can do.

By the end of the film if you begin to feel for the characters, then it has been a sincere effort.

That is the beauty of storytelling. Its not what is right and wrong, what works and doesnt work, what needs to be repaired and what cant be repaired.

Its about how simply you can say it, how well you can hook the reader / the viewer and let them share the same emotions and feelings which you shared while writing the script.

If we as writers manage to do that, then our job is done. Doesnt matter if it is flawed then..

Keep writing

Channelise this anger into your script

This sir sir sir business

Tell me how do I go about it

Goes outside the window and what remains

Is nothing but your anger

Your characters and your writing

Someday it will strike a chord

Somewhere..

Empty

Empty empty empty

My heart is completely empty

At a loss am I

With words, meanings and emotions

From where have you come

O eternal void

And filled my heart with yourself

That everything I do

Isnt worth doing

Every moment I live

Isnt worth living

Do I belong here

Is the big question

Is this what I want to do

Is the big question

Who am I

I don’t know

Where am I

I don’t know

I cry, I scream, I sob

Tears of silence

Hoping that something will

Melt somewhere and take a form

A form so deep and definite

That it’ll lead me to where I belong

From where there is no return

Where there is no second..

There is only one aim and object

A place where my heart is at peace

At rest with its silence

Bring me to light from this

Everlapping darkness

The sun shines glorified outside

While my insides burn in darkness

Bring a meaning to this life

Where are you, my beloved..

Show me the path

And lead me to my bliss…

I am falling..

Can you imagine what this life is

Everyday the same old truama

I sometimes wonder what past karma

that I am now in this state

Without love, support and faith

How long can a man survive alone

Everywhere around me there is misery

Each single person has a problem

And is a problem in himself

What is this life

But a question each day

I cease to exist

I fail to understand

My mind runs a thousand images

My heart beats an extra time

I don’t know who I am

I don’t know what to do

All I know

Is that I am going deep

Inside a dark hollow tunnel

Which has no end…

I am falling

I am falling

And I am falling..

Power of the Mind

No mind...

...is the theory which the practitioners of Bushido follow.

What is no mind? It is a state of such concentration that for that moment, the consciousness of the self vanishes. It is so immersed with its object, that it becomes one with it!

Now what is this? Nothing but a sufi thought. Being one with the object.

And the strange part is our mind functions at its best when we are doing something which we shouldnt be doing.

Right or wrong is not the point here. Point is when our subconscious knows, when our system knows, when the mind is aware that something is off-track here - it activates all energy centres, and focuses until it doesnt merge with the object and succeeds or it pricks your conscience to such a level, that you leave it and walk away.

Either way the mind succeeds....

Only if we could channelise this power in a more constructive manner, in a more enriching manner...

Only if we could..

Myths and Stories

What are myths?

Stories we've heard in our childhood? About kings, queens, palaces, monsters, demons?

And we grow up listening to them not realising that they eventually become part of our psyche..our very existence...

Because somewhere these myths, these fables, these stories draw us to them. It is the timeless wisdom and knowledge, told in the most simplistic manner - which touches us deep down..

This is the magic of storytelling...

... a story can change your life ..